Guys

I feel like I have been neglecting my blog - I am back! :))

It's been a really weird week - it was like I was deep in a cave somewhere - in a forest - not able to see the wood for the trees. It's really had an affect, not being at work for almost 5 months now - you start to doubt just about everything. The flow of work here is really slow and the thought of moving to Toronto looms, but for reasons that I have mentioned before, the idea does not thrill me. It's not an easy thing to up sticks. If I'm completely honest, I think the countdown to my 40th is having a huge impact on my wellbeing too. Aren't we all seemingly conditioned by society to have acheived so much by now. Even watching the Royal Wedding was causing some anxiety for me - I'm glad it's over and we can finally get back to normality.

I did get up in the early hours to watch it - the wedding I mean. I was so interested to see what her dress was going to be like. All a little bit surreal really - I hope they 'make it' :)

My friend has been having a really tough time too - she's heading back to Colombia in June - which makes me sad - she's really the best friend that I have here. She's always been there for me and it won't be the same without her. We went out on Saturday night to console each other - must say that we had a right laugh. But looking around the bar, it was all a tad strange, it was like I went back in time to when I first got here to Vancouver - looking at strangers and the way they interact and funnily enough nothing has changed.

A girl came in who I was friends with some years ago until she shagged the guy I was very much into. It was funny to see her pinched up face across the bar - she didn't see me - and I actually felt very sorry for her. I mean what makes people do things like that? It's a story as long as the Slovenian's and perhaps I will write more when I can muster up the words :) And then these yukky Italian guys to my right at the bar were trying to chat us up - over and over all you could hear was 'excuse me, excuse me, excuse me'. For some reason the fact that I had my back to them and was deep in conversation with my friend was not enough for them to see that I had no interest in them whatsoever!!!! Oh and then he got nasty with me and passed a comment as he was leaving - really? - I even asked him if there was really any need for that.

Then I noticed that there was this proper old creepy guy who was just freaking staring at me from across the bar. Proper staring - and proper creepy. When my friend went to the washroom, he actually came up to me to introduce himself - startled me more like. I mean I just turned around to see his ugly mug in my face. YUK!!!!!

So after a couple of wines, we left - my friend wanted to go and say hi to her friend who works at coat check at one of the clubs - so there I am hanging about outside waiting when a guy came over and started to chat me up. He wasn't all that - looked a bit of a Kev to be fair - chav - even had these little diamonds around the whole of the face of his watch - I notice these things. But it passed the 15 or so minutes it took my friend to get her a$$ back outside. He and his friend asked us to join them for another drink - so we went - just for the fun of it. He was boring me with details of how well travelled he was and how much money he had and how much this he had and how much that he had. So I thought I'd start yanking his chain and asked him what his goals were in life - none!!! He had nothing!!!

We got to the bar and he popped himself on a stool opposite this blonde girl - okay - so I could see him looking at her - in fact he was unable to take his eyes of her - literally. Non-stop staring. I was embarrassed for him. I necked my vodka martini and then he bent down and pretended to pick up a piece of paper and then gave it to blondie - it obviously had his number on it. That was it, I picked up my bag and walked out - I mean - what a d*ck!!!!!!  Kev was nothing to look at and I wasn't gonna sit there and have my intelligence insulted. Even his mate came out and apologized :)

Oh well - so there you have it - another crap night out in Vancouver. The icing on the cake was this smoking hot guy that chatted to us as we were walking up the street to get a cab. He was gorgeous - tall, dark and drippingly handsome. So we stood and flirted until I see a silver flash on his left hand and would you f'ing believe it - MARRIED!!!! Celebrating his 30th birthday with his wife fast asleep at home.

Icing on the cake and time for us to go home!!!!

I kid you not - by the time I shut the door behind me when I got home, I realized why I'm still single in this sh*t hole!!!! :)

I think there's something in the water here that makes blokes behave like complete pr*cks!!!!! :)

You gotta laugh.

So what else has happened this week? Well I have gotten myself addicted to watching Eastenders almost in real time on youtube - and while viewing that saw a dozen postings for MF - wondered what that was - Misfits - so now I am watching that too. OMG - it's so funny - if you get the chance, watch it! The Irish guy is hilarious. So that's about it really - gorgeous day today, absolutely gorgeous. Summer is well and truly on its' way.

Gonna love you and leave you now and get to my Doreen Virtue meditation - it worked wonders yesterday to clear my energy - it's the first time in a long time that the alarm actually woke me up :) Felt back to myself today - thank goodness - it's nice to actually recognize yourself in the mirror - Finally, I'm back!!!!! :)